Wishing Away

A clear childhood memory places me on a bus-ride home from school. I was probably about 9 years old on the bus and thinking over and over, "I wish i was 13, I wish i was 13, I wish i was 13" I wished for those years because 13 was a teenager. You were old, you could have boyfriends and a grown-up body, and wear make-up. But 13 hit, and wasn't that excited. Most boys weren't that cool, make-up was highly overrated, a grown-up body came with grown-up annoyances. So then i wished for 18. I mean 18 you could do anything! You could drive, go anywhere you want, not listen to your parents, move out, be an adult. But then 18 hit, and that wasn't that exciting. So then i wished for being older.. no such age. but to be in college, have my future planned out, maybe be married, etc, etc. And so the wishing game begins. I've looked back and realized that i wish away my life. Instead of taking every day as a gift, i wish for the next. Its a horrible cycle that needs an end, and so today i'm goign to try, to stop it. Today what do i need to be thankful for, what do i need to do. I need to focus on school take full advantage of the schooling provided to me. I need to be thankful for friends, some who live so far, but still are so close. Family, that right now, it quite wonderful. I need to work on loving as much as I can, Seek God as much as i can, and become a disciple as much as i can. I'm tired of thinking taht maybe tomorrow God will make me into a better, stronger person, and need to strive for that today. Don't plan the future, let it come as a surprise. And be thankful for every moment you have today. Lord willing i will have a long life. But for no all i know is i have today. So let me take it with pleasure.