So often I forget, so often i try to have the exact answer at the exact time, so often I try to understand every action and every feeling I have. So often I try to be tough and say things like "i am hardcore."... well i guess not that often. But so often I get lost in thoughts, in dreams, in motivations, that i forget who i am. I am just a girl. It took a sappy movie to get that drilled through my head this time.
I watched a walk to remember and cried like a baby. The story is of a perfect, sweet, innocent love. A love that most search for and only some find. A love of mystery and clarity. I cried because fate tore them apart. The movie is sappy, lame, stupid and i loved it. I loved it because my heart wants that love. My incredibly girly heart searches for it. But my incredibly contemplative mind often shuns it. Too much to do, too little time. But that doesn't mean that I don't always want it. I am very much a girl, and cry very much like a girl. I just don't always act so much like a girl. But i am, just a girl.
2 comments:
Everyone is 'just a girl', then, including me. We all want love, uncomplicated happiness, warmth and rainbows. There's nothing wrong with that desire - it's an appreciation for what is pure and beautiful in life, even if the picture we often get of the 'real' world is different. It sounds like you're ashamed of your desire for these things - in my opinion, you really shouldn't be.
i knew you were going to cry as soon you told me you were going to go watch this.
ahhh there's a sap inside all of us that desires such a deep, dramatic, sacrifical love of our own :P
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